Life Goals 101
We are born depending on other people for all our needs. That sense of helplessness continues in life until you starting learning to fend for yourself and take care of your own needs. But, even as adults who are fully capable of meeting the basic needs of life, it is still possible to feel helpless or lack the confidence that you can solve problems on your own.
Changing helplessness until empowerment is an excellent personal development goal that can leave you feeling more confident and with a higher sense of self. While everyone lacks confidence from time to time, if your feelings of helplessness persist, it is time to take charge and change your life.
You can empower yourself through determination and patience, and when you do, you’ll feel like you can accomplish anything toward which you set your mind.
Feeling Hopeless and Helpless
If you have a strong sense of helplessness, it is likely that you have repeated this belief and corresponding behaviours many times in the past. Others in your life may even be encouraging the perpetuation of these helpless behaviours by giving you attention and even doing things for you that you are, with the right motivation, completely capable of doing yourself.
Learned helplessness is when you grow to depend upon the support, validation, and assistance of others when you claim to be unable to help yourself. When you repeatedly turn the support of others into an excuse to not help yourself, you learn to be helpless. And this habit is one that should be changed.
Well-meaning friends, partners, and family members may be encouraging your helplessness by enabling your behaviour. The first step toward defeating these thoughts is to recognize what is happening, then make an effort to overcome them through positive actions. Below, we share some suggestions for activities that can help you feel more empowered and less helpless in your life.
How to Feel More Empowered
Start Small
Start by finding small instances where you feel less than confident and begin there. How can you fix just one problem or make progress in one area? What’s one thing you can do today to improve your situation? Identify small, daily steps that are helpful and contribute toward a solution for your worries or issues. Do something small each day, and you’ll soon realize just how much more you can do.
Don’t Rely on Others
You do not need sympathy from others; you need action. Instead of worrying about whether others feel sorry for you or are ready to lend a hand, focus instead on your own feelings and actions. Visualize how good you will feel when you are able to accomplish something on your own. Say no when others offer to help.
Take Responsibility
Pay attention to how you talk to yourself and how you think. You have choices in how you react to situations and others, so it’s time to take responsibility for your decisions. Only you can make yourself feel bad or out of control. So, decide it is time to start taking control, and you will start to feel like you can make a difference in your own life.
Get Professional Support
Extreme feelings of helplessness may signal some deeper issues related to your sense of self. It may be helpful to seek the guidance of a therapist or counselor to help you get to the root of your feelings and deal with them productively.
Look for professionals who specialize in cognitive behaviour therapy and other approaches that are designed to help you learn new, healthier behaviours. Helpless thoughts can lead to depression or anxiety, so definitely seek help if you are experiencing these.
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Having a viewpoint shows your interests and passions. Most people find others with no opinions to be boring. Know where you stand on issues important to your beliefs and be sure you have information to support your perspectives. But, you should also be willing to listen to others’ views and use those to evaluate your own stance. Make an effort to talk with people whose views are different than yours to understand their perspective better.
By making the choice to design the life you really want, versus letting life just happen to you, you will experience some crucial benefits. Taking control of your life and going after the things that are really important to you can help you not only achieve your dreams but also learn new skills, find new opportunities, and let go of the fears that are holding you back. Here are the top five reasons you should start today to design the life you really want.
Very true. I had insomnia for a few months. I closely analysed the situation and realised it was my elevated blood pressure that kept me up. Instead of taking all my BP pills in the morning I split it 2 ways. Morning and evening. And tried meditation before going to sleep. Experienced great improvement in my sleep pattern. Though not 100%. But improvement nevertheless.